Archive for the ‘The search for the self’ Category

Magical Clouds

If I had not seen clouds before
would this not have been the most magical sight ever ?
it was,
at the moment that the picture was clicked, randomly
was the first time I ever saw clouds
and was overwhelmed,

Mythology, Story Telling and Einstein

In an ‘amoral’ Universe that is neither moral nor immoral, Mythology or Mythic story telling is the attempt of our imagination to comprehend our existence in moral terms. Or moral contradictions
Our Mythology, our Mythic selves are much more than the idea of the stories that are/were told to us. We are the very stories that we tell ourselves. And always have been. From the time we were born. From the time that Human beings started to imagine.
The first art was the art of story telling.
From the time that Man tried to express lightning and thunder as the anger of the Gods and developed moral stories around it, to the postulations of Einstein’s theory’s of relativity, the beginings have been in a story told to oneself, and then shared. Stories which comes from a deep seated mythology embedded in our consciousness.
Stories are moral contradictions, re interpreted again and again. The Universe itself exists in contradictions, and the contradictions are never ending. When you solve one contradiction, another emerges. And so the Universe goes on. If the contradictions went away – the Universe would cease to exist. As would we, as would all imagination. We would cease to exist, and yes, the ultimate contradiction that we exist and do not exist at the same time is the most tantalizing contradiction of all.
So if you cannot do away with contradictions, how do you come to terms with them ? By finding Harmony in them. By being the contradiction itself. By becoming ‘one with the duality’ as Buddha and all the great spiritualists say. And so the great poet finds Harmony in the contradiction of words, the mathematician finds harmony in the contradiction of numbers ( with the concept of a non number of nothingness, the zero, being the ultimate contradiction without which modern maths could not exist). The great Musicians find Harmony in the contradiction of notes, the painters in conflicting colours, and spiritualist in the duality of existence. And Einstien searched for Harmony through his equations in the contradictions of Space and Time.
Einstien too was looking for a story to explain mythic concepts like Space and Time. He called them equations but hey ! – he was indulging in his own story telling – his own Mythology.
The above was a part of a discussion I led on ‘Mythology and Story telling’ at a Screenwriting workshop at the IIT campus in Chennai, which was a lot of fun,
And Einstein.

Solitary Confinement

The mind looks to confine
to measure
to contextualize
to give meaning
to itself
for the ego
can exist only
in finite possibilities
needing to enclose itself
in a part of the universe
walled off
from the rest of creation
and from within that prison
to show itself off
yearning to be recognized,
to be individualized
to be admired
and from within that prison
to be loved !
that everything around itself
has confined itself too
imprisoned itself too
sensing the universe
surrounded by
imagined bits of similar prisons
a love you could embrace
the whole universe with
if only you came out of
the solitary confinement
your ego has imprisoned you in

What is a Prayer ? from Cinda

what is this prayer? what does the words do when they leave your thoughts and transend to the winds of free flowingness? is it the words? is it the thought that goes with the words? is it the intention that creates the power to move the energy from one form to the next?
do the intentions come naturally or are they already prefixed and they just enter us at moments of aligned frequency?how do we do what we do? where does the prayer get processed…does it need processing?
what is a prayer?

Why was I born ?

I looked for my true calling
I looked for my true purpose
what I am supposed to do on the planet
why was I born ?
and I asked the question deep inside me
beyond logic, beyond thought, deep in the bowels
of the space where I connect to the universe
where I can be thrown into the raging storm of ‘not knowing’
and the answer hit me in an immense tidal wave of understanding
“you are your own purpose
nothing more, and nothing less
a bundle of purpose and karma
all existing within itself
and the only thing holding it back
is the separation created by
words like ‘I’ and ‘my’ and ‘me'”


you can change the world, of course
but can you change yourself ?

Passion and Attachment

Ray asked “I get conflicted about whether to live life with passion or dispassion? Attachment, passion and egoism aren’t they impurities of the mind? I get further confused when the above comes from you. ”
I never want to take on the mantle of someone that imparts knowledge, Ray, but as a fellow searcher let me explore. Passion belongs to the moment and Attachment is addicted to the past or the future. Attachment is desire while Passion is pure acceptance. Desire brings with it the fear of non achievement, but Passion has no fear. Mira’s passion for Krishna was not a desire for Krishna but a Pure Passion. It was not an attachment to Krishna but a love so pure and passionate that she was one with Krishna. Passion is universal and flows consistently and is limitless, the bhakti of Mira was never ending in it’s force of expression.
Shakespeare wrote a great line for Juliet (Romeo and Juliet) ” he is a beggar that can measure his worth”. She was speaking about love. Passion is beyond measurement, it explodes through the clouds of contextualization. For it has no measure to compare it to.
Attachment and desire are contextualized and contained by measurement – they are reigned in by fear of non achievement – and by comparison, self loathing and envy. Passion is not only selfless but the letting go of the self. Passion is action not addicted to a defined result. Pure Passion leads to pure action. Attachment leads to reaction, not action”.
Lets continue to explore.

It all comes around

This is from Manav. I feel completely humbled. I had no idea when I started the blog this is where it would lead :
“whatever you wrote is so much sense, that it all comes around in the end. My wife has lupus and her kidneys are 80 % damaged. Doctors here in US, have suggested Dialysis and she just believed Ramdev so much, inspite of me telling her not to risk her life, she did all that therapy diligently that she is feeling better.. all her edemas are gone and the blood reports are getting back to normal. She had this clarity & a positive mental Attitude that works wonders for her even at times, when most of the people would probably give in. Now I, not only respect her, there is this feeling that is indescribable. Sometimes, when I am into some trouble, she would just say ” Bhagwan jo karta hai, achhe ke liye karta hai” and now I realize that simple statement to be so true..
So it all comes around.
I have been an avid reader of your blog and read and forwarded your articles to thousands of people (I know off)all around the world to know and understand, at least try once a day to understand as to WHY and WHAT you write…
This world should be better because of people like you.. Like you said ” we must be responsible bloggers”.
PLEASE keep writing. Always.
Manav Malhotra

The inner voice

As I sit here
as I often do
waitng for the first blush of blue
to lighten the dark of the sky
a moment so traqnquill
that God insists on teasing us with it
snatching it away
to remind us of the day ahead
I wonder
where is my inner voice
does it lie in the sounds of the birds twittering ?
does it lie in the gradual changing of the shades of blue
does it lie in the gentle breeze that lifts to rejoice the new day ?
how can it lie merely within me ?
and as I watch the first shade of pink emerge
in a cloud so soft
like a new born baby
how arrogant of me to try and listen for a voice
coming from inside my head
of even my soul, if there ever be one
for if there be such a thing
as an inner voice
than surely it must be shared
by the first blue of the sky
by the first pink of the clouds
by the first singing of the birds

“Thy Will be done”

Thy Will be done
Is part of the christian prayer
that I always assumed was part of a strict adherence
but then, if you let go
of any attachment to result
as the Bhagvad Geeta asks us to
and if the ‘Thy’ is God
and God is the Universe
then it means the same thing