but nothing less
I am not
who you think I am
I am not
who I think I am
all that is
and all that is not
that was never born
or ever died
that has no word
that I am
22 thoughts on “I am that”
excellent, i like it much
seems to be an English version of the statement made by God to Hrinayakashyap ( Refer to Mythology)
Sir, your poems do have a very complex meaning to it……This doesn’t sound like that but in reality,it is….we just have to keep thinking…..Thank you for enlightening me
…in the core of this physical existance
rests the formless of who we are…
nothingness and everythingness…
I just am……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
Sounds a lot like Osho……..during the last days of his sick life 😉
True advaita..sounds so complex but in essence the simplest thing ever.
Bulla ki jana, main kon..!!
That was really a gr8 poem , hope every one of us should read this … Thnx for such a wonderful lines …. Hopping to see more of your …
You have a great experience with you thats why it came out so well in these lines.
good expression !!!
i am what i think……………
Shekhar, you have met many Gurus in your journey, can you share your conversations with them? Who all have you met?
Love it! (smiling)
i am. everything is.
I have been hopefully awaiting your response, despite the fact that I have yet to receive one. I assume that you didn’t understand what I intended to at the most or at the very least you chose to undermine a comment made by someone you’ve simply never met before. Regardless, is there not an ache of curiosity?
She wrote a beautiful story of reincarnation…”
I never knew you existed up until eight months ago, though it was those exact words you’ve spoken that triggered a wave of understanding, a reason and a victory in a childish game of connect the dots over an extraordinary event that weighed heavily on me for the past several years.
There are a few questions that I would appreciate you answering, when you can afford the time of course.
– What are your views of ‘fictional character ‘ Anik Kadam?
– Would you say that the outline of the character is some what emulative of yourself?
– Why does the author agree that Mr Kadam and Mr Kapur seem strikingly similar as if kindred spirits? Have you met the author before?
– What are your views on birthmarks and their origins?
– What are your views of reincarnation?
– If your soul came back to fulfill one purpose, what do you think that purpose would be?
There is a letter that I would like for you to read in order for you to perhaps get a different perspective with regards to the messages I’ve been writing to you.
Although the individual it was intended for never received it from her assistant, I was violently trying to explain something I didn’t understand at the time.
It was very impulsive and quite confidential yet by the time I had reached the last line there wasn’t a single cloud of doubt shadowing whether I should sent it.
After re-reading that letter a thousand times after pressing send, I realized that writing that letter was not for her, it was for me.
November 6th 2014
Dear Mrs Houck,
I have been contemplating whether or not to contact you in this manner for years, hoping that I would meet you at one of your book signings or events but unfortunately it would seem it always didn’t go as planned. I’m sitting here in my bedroom, after pacing hours upon end, thinking if writing you a letter is how I wanted it to be played out. After ironically realizing the person I am, though still paralyzed on the thought of opening myself up to someone for the first time, I decided to start typing anyway even though I wasn’t sure if I was going to press send.
I think it would be best to start from the beginning. I was born in Durban in 1990. A time when apartheid was in full swing in a country full of contradictions. I am indeed South African by nationality, but Indian by heritage. Both my parents were born here as well. Growing up in a country where one man made a tremendous impact that echoed throughout the entire world makes you wonder whats written in your destiny that would impact the world, but for most people here it doesn’t.
I have always believed that when the time was right there would be a passion that has been in you that would be so overwhelming it would feel as if a switch has flipped. There would be nothing for you to do but fight for it instead of against it.
In the months leading up to the year I turned 21, there was an undeniable switch that flipped in my life. Logically from the view of others all the signs showed it was switched off, not that it was on to begin with, but on the inside I felt as if it was switched on. It was unexplainable. I locked myself from the world. I couldn’t speak of it. I could only feel. I realized it wasn’t a choice. It was given. I had great hope in myself. Many seasons went by and lessons were placed upon my life, forcing me learn about the broken pieces of my past. My experiences, my mistakes, my heartaches. It began to open up old wounds that I can’t speak of without weeping. I was hurt. I became tired. Seeing your parents eyes knowing you are not living up to their expectations is something I do not wish upon anyone. Lost but perpetually staying true to my values, I decided to look for answers. Looking up, the only thing I could see were the stars. Astrology, numerology, the laws of the universe. I was struck by the answers I found. It was set in stone that I was going to be an actor. I’ve always had a dream of it when I was younger but at the time it seemed impossible. Having a dream on one side of the world and being stuck on the other. Where would I start? What would they tell me? You should of moved east instead of west? How would I possible I fit in? Will I meet that cute girl from unfabulous? Questions started to burden my heart and my head turned into a jungle.
I thought about God. My father was from a Hinduisim background but converted to Christianity after marrying my mother. I was raised Christian but I had stopped attending church in my late teen years becoming more spiritual than religious, which they didn’t approve of. How would I explain this to them? I found a map in the stars? I decided not to talk but to fight for the life I intended. My mind thought up great plans. Events started to occur that tested my loyalty. Fighting for what others want to see in you instead of what you want to see in yourself can only end badly. Something was guiding me, bring me down untill I became strong, rubbing against me untill I became polished, pushing me in different directions. I was missing out on life and my heart couldn’t take it any longer. In a time when I thought it was all over, was when it all began.
In the most unexplainable and amazing way, which I could only compare to the force of nature, your books found its way into my hands. Was this fate? Was the universe actually conspiring with me? Was the plans I wrote beginning to motion? Alagan Dhiren Rajaram. The amount of myself that I saw in this character and the amount of this character that I saw in myself was infinite. It was beyond anything I could of ever imagined. I tried to convince myself that this wasn’t real but that wasn’t the case. The amount of unchangeable intricate details. I never saw myself as perfect so i looked at the way other people depicted this character through art. I cannot begin to express the amount of emotion that ran through me after seeing countless sketches on the Internet. It surpassed the physical features and spun deep down into the core of my soul. An emulation. An unexplainable connection. How could this be? The same person in different life paths? It became personal. Mirroring my values, my character, the personal vows I made to myself. The more I tried to tell myself this isn’t real, the more stronger it grew. Raging in my heart like a never ending storm. I couldn’t sleep. Nothing in the world was the same as before. It rippled throughout my hopes, my dreams, my needs. It built itself into this passionate angst that was going to implode if didn’t express it. Up to this very moment, I still can not explain it. I would imagine expressing it would bring a great feeling of fulfillment, a distinctive happiness, an unconditional feeling of passion. It was a true sign that there really is something that guides all things.
I started researching individuals throughout time. Actors in particular. How they related to the characters they portrayed. How deep their emotions went in finding themselves in these characters. How the choices they made in their lives influenced who they chose to play. How their minds distinguished between fantasy and reality. I was looking for different answers. Answers that pointed to only one question. Was I loosing my mind?
I didn’t understand it. I didn’t need to. Some of the most basic things we treasure in life can not be understood. Something was undoubtedly holding me back in every possible direction, patiently waiting for the right time. I accepted it. I decided to fight for it and not against it.
To say I read your novels everyday would be an understatement. You are an incredibly talented writer who’s personal story I find immensely motivating. I thank you dearly for igniting your own passion in writing so that I could ignite mine. I understand if you find this explanation of mine overwhelming but I have no option but to believe that you are the only person I can trust with this unexplainable event that was thrust upon my life. I don’t know how I’m going to get to America but I assure you I will be portraying this character.