A Directors Prayer

If I am not struggling,
is there no creative process ?

If I am not exploring,
is there no discovery ?
and is it discovery I am looking for
or is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow
just another deeper,
more profound,
more relevant question ?
If I am not in angst with the script,
are my characters not in angst with themselves ?
am I the director, another character in angst ?
Can I live in the story ?
Can I both create a world, and then step into it myself ?
Who am I in this film ?
The last four days have been easier
I finished on time
I have not been torn apart
is something going wrong ?
have I lost my passion ?
or am I just well prepared
am I too prepared ?
am I not being organic ?
please, can I continue to live on the edge ?
to explore on the edge
let me be a sail whipped around in the wind
let the symphony engulf me
and please
can it be totally unpredictable ?
and let every moment be a question
where every thought is dispersed
and a new one rushes in to fill the vaccum
Please do not let me become a prisoner
of my knowledge
of career
of a job
of my desire
to please
of my need
to be appreciated

3 thoughts on “A Directors Prayer

  1. Freedom comes in commiting yourself to the wind,
    knowing that everything you have been told before, everything you tell yourself now,
    it is all a lie.
    Peace lies in remembering you are exactly as you should be … the work is already perfect and has always been. What else is there for you to do with the film now except to realize it?

  2. Shekhar, feel free to pay us a visit at kindergarten class…it never loses its element of unexpected surprises, mystery and suspense. We have a universe that spins out of its axis and back again…some of the great whirling dancers can be experienced here! 🙂

  3. Ah, when the Master becomes enslaved by his royalty,
    All else fails to tantalize the mind;
    which once laid strewn like blindness while in its intent
    finding no pleasure, in another day well spent
    Oh, the demise of the Master’s grain;
    to grind without pressure, is not the same?
    Smiles Shekhar! and May your desire unfold itself for you while developing for our “passion” The Golden Age!

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