A Directors Prayer

If I am not struggling,
is there no creative process ?

If I am not exploring,
is there no discovery ?
and is it discovery I am looking for
or is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow
just another deeper,
more profound,
more relevant question ?
If I am not in angst with the script,
are my characters not in angst with themselves ?
am I the director, another character in angst ?
Can I live in the story ?
Can I both create a world, and then step into it myself ?
Who am I in this film ?
The last four days have been easier
I finished on time
I have not been torn apart
is something going wrong ?
have I lost my passion ?
or am I just well prepared
am I too prepared ?
am I not being organic ?
please, can I continue to live on the edge ?
to explore on the edge
let me be a sail whipped around in the wind
let the symphony engulf me
and please
can it be totally unpredictable ?
and let every moment be a question
where every thought is dispersed
and a new one rushes in to fill the vaccum
Please do not let me become a prisoner
of my knowledge
of career
of a job
of my desire
to please
of my need
to be appreciated

3 Responses to “A Directors Prayer”

  1. JKH says:

    Freedom comes in commiting yourself to the wind,
    knowing that everything you have been told before, everything you tell yourself now,
    it is all a lie.
    Peace lies in remembering you are exactly as you should be … the work is already perfect and has always been. What else is there for you to do with the film now except to realize it?

  2. Cinda says:

    Shekhar, feel free to pay us a visit at kindergarten class…it never loses its element of unexpected surprises, mystery and suspense. We have a universe that spins out of its axis and back again…some of the great whirling dancers can be experienced here! 🙂

  3. North says:

    Ah, when the Master becomes enslaved by his royalty,
    All else fails to tantalize the mind;
    which once laid strewn like blindness while in its intent
    finding no pleasure, in another day well spent
    Oh, the demise of the Master’s grain;
    to grind without pressure, is not the same?
    Smiles Shekhar! and May your desire unfold itself for you while developing for our “passion” The Golden Age!

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