if my spirit
nurtured yours
as yours did mine

then the crossing
of our paths
are forever
blessed upon
our seperated journeys

28 thoughts on “farewell…

  1. Dear Shekhar
    If you imagine whose face you want to see at the moment this life ends, would you allow yourself to be separate from that person now? Men seem to be OK with separateness. Women seem more aware that death can happen at any time, and want to see those they love while they can. That’s how it seems to me, anyway: That women’s supposedly more profound and patient love comes from a deep conviction of the fragility of life. Men seem to wake up to it only in moments of heavy crisis, like death or near-death. I get so frustrated at the denseness of y’all guys. 🙂
    love, Heath

  2. trying to continue it where you ended… hope you don’t mind
    if our journeys
    were always one
    or yours was to reach me
    and mine was to reach you
    then the crossing
    of our paths
    never happened
    because blessed upon are
    our journeys unto each other
    into eternity!

  3. Shekhar,
    I am surprised at these lines coming from you. This is a typical reaction when a member of male species encounters a situation which requires him to choose between a person of his affection and a change in a set thought pattern. I have never heard these words from a woman. Men can live with the pain of separation but cannot bear the pain of changing your “set” ideas.
    I believe that this is a defeatist and selfish emotion. Not that people are not allowed to be selfish and stupid, but what about the person whose path you crossed. Why should they agree with you with your idea of “blessedness”?

  4. Shekhar,
    I am talking about every relationship that matters, even with self. These words reflect a painful finality that one has unhappily accepted.
    Similarity of emotion coming from different men in different states is a little uncomforting. You were probably also refering to the way you have nurtured my soul or and vice versa, but I have feeling that that’s not what you are talking about.
    May be it’s just me, but your words above evoked similar emotion as some of Shiv Kumar Batalvi’s poems did.

  5. nav, i am going to do a post on this. The assumption that men can live easier wiith the pain of seperation than women ? Certainly not in my case. The pain of seperation from someone that u have come to depend upon for nurturing is painful. But there is one way to destroy all relationships – that is to hold on, to posses. To be able to let go is what adds beauty and compassion to passion and love, as with life

  6. Shekhar,
    I am questioning letting go a relationship when you don’t want to…
    Why do we equate a tendency to understand and adapt in a relationship with possessiveness? Why “letting go” is equivalent to adding beauty, why not something else? At least in my eyes it is not.
    Why does any deep relationship goes from “aha” to “Na uh”? If it had much depth at any point in life, letting go is relatively an easy but silly solution. Even a poem has to have some logic…even though it comes from the other side of brain.

  7. Dear Shekhar
    The assumptions may be related to the timing of things in your life that are publically visible, in a mix with each reader’s life experience and current issues.
    While holding on can destroy relationships, so can letting go.
    A while ago, I was moving to a deeper relationship point, and I’d visualize a door and a dark room beyond, that was filled with pain. And I wanted to run from it. One day, my vision allowed me to enter the room. And there within the shell of pain I found such beauty. I still have to kick myself to enter my internal battlefields. When I do, my love becomes deeper. My Arjuna side sometimes wants to run away, but so far Krishna has prevented it. I can’t tell you how grateful I am that this is so.
    I was interested to read in Wiki (which I thank God for, too) that Arjuna had Hanuman’s support. Hanuman’s presence has quietly invaded my life, and challenged me to grow beyond limits I didn’t know existed.
    love, Heath

  8. Nav’s post reeks of emotion. No living entity can take ‘pain’ – let alone pain of seperation – unless the said pain is from a person of effection – now that is very subjective .
    Seperation is a healthy choice which some overly emotional people cannot comprehend – the very fact that someone wants out implies the conditioned state of external togetherness.
    genuine connections donot need coaxing , coercing and on the other hand , no genuine relationship worth its salt can be sustained based on emotional belt hitting or obligation. this is where lines between weakness and compassion vanish , also the lines between strength and seeming harshness.
    Life sometimes demands surgical operations of the to remove dead matter attached to the psyche that causes distress , drags movement and chokes inner life.
    Like Katha Upanishad says , ‘ Good is different from Pleasant . They both present themselves, they seem the same but with completely different results – the wise choose the good , the fools the pleasant ‘ – Immortal words of counsel from Lord Yama – God of Death , to mankind.

  9. Dear Rudra
    Is there something wrong with emotion, that when one feels it or writes in its grip, one is said to be reeking?
    I thought Nav’s post was honest and heartfelt. It smelled clean and sweet, like pure water.
    If we need scriptures to strengthen us to be distant and objective, are these qualities always the healthiest choice? Or are they names we put on various faces of fear?
    In my experience, genuine connections do need coaxing on a daily basis, because we cover their purity with our fallible human behavior so they become almost invisible. Relationship work consists of trying to remove humanity’s debris while allowing the human to thrive and the connection to become visible again. Work it is, often. And worthwhile work, too, imho. It’s hard, it has to be done delicately, and that it has to be done doesn’t diminish a connection. Finding the will and insight to do it, and do it right, is an expression of a valid connection. Imho.
    love, Heath

  10. Dear Heather , i was only referring to the words of expression , not the person themselves . A broad brush always triggers my juxtapositioning .
    i have been accused of quoting ‘ good is different from pleasant ‘ quite a lot in my personal life , i have also been unfairly accused of converting life into a ‘software program’ – we are sometimes victims of what we desire , some love the security of misty half-light while some prefer to work in total light.
    I respect your questions, heath – sources of wisdom are infinite for a seeker – ‘scripture’ is just a word, while the message matters – i am sure you appreciate the wisdom of the quote.
    heartless strength derived from logical justifications is not healthy – i agree with you there.sometimes we are victims of our compassion and obligation – and we hurt ourselves and unwittingly hurt others in the long term. but how about being compassionate to both and what if that compassion points to soul saving seperation?
    It is one thing to know , another to act on that knwoledge – it takes strength.
    if distance and objectivity are only faces of fear , we will have to find out what kind of fear it is that drives someone ? fear of a material kind ? fear of a spiritual kind ? fear for the self ? or fear for collective wellbeing ? – if we know that i think we know the answers.
    peace , Rudra.

  11. Nav, it is not strange to look at the world through our experiences. But there could be more to the world than what we have seen till now.
    You have seen the pain of separation. Nobody is debating your experience. But there could be a lot more to it than just that. In different context/background it could take/bring different shape, meaning and result. Sometimes it could be just pain, sometimes pain that blesses others, sometimes a joy, sometimes unavoidable, sometimes avoidable, sometimes the motive is us, sometimes the one we love.
    There are certain times only with separation there is growth. There are times when it purposes freedom. There are times when it brings healing. Sometimes it brings out beauty in a person/situation in a way that nothing else could.
    The context of the writer might be important to be able to feel/experience the beauty and richness of the writing

  12. I dont understand why you are gone
    Or where
    You say you are
    With your own tongue
    So I will accept
    What my ears hear
    And What my eyes read.
    But tell me
    This before you go
    Was that all it was to you?
    This physical coming and going
    You seemed to have defined our relationship by?
    Then it is best you go
    For we seemed to have been standing on different planes
    You on a physical one
    And me on one from which there is no here nor there
    No you and me
    No then and now
    No explanations asked and none given
    Now that you have started to explain yourself
    I suddenly hear a voice I dont recognise

  13. Interesting posts. I came across this website Shekhar because we exchanged emails once after meeting in Puerto Rico, and when I just read “farewell” I took it with complete simplicity. It takes but a split second for a soul to be nurtured by another, and that is always a blessing. Am I missing something here?

  14. no, Melita, you are understanding it exactly as it is meant to be, and nice to hear from you, shekhar

  15. paths cross and you live a life in a very less time.. after the phase is over you realise that you have grown much more than you were …. shekharji… this is true that to let it go adds to beauty and compassion to passion… gives it a true meaning called love…. but is it really possible to carry that all along throught out your life? Is it really possible to live without that person who nurtured the soul?

  16. Respected Shekhar ji,
    A seed makes a tree. A tree gives us many fruits. Is it not enough that those fruits are also the part of the “one Seed”. Therefore, whether or not, you spirit be nurtured by any or you nurture any’s spirit, it hardly makes any difference in terms of crossing the road. In any case we all have to meet in a same place irrespective our different ways.
    Thanks for your small but beautiful poem.
    A.K. Bhattacharyya

  17. Dear Shekhar,
    Every farewell is painful and the interia of the moment prevents us from moving ahead…thinking beyond …but we ultimately do move ahead!! What remains with us the enlightenments and the influence every nanosecond our soul experienced and evolved with..some of the learning are temporary which few are permanent ones..finally we owe something to every journey..every moment..life moves on
    Shruti Anand,Ranchi,Jharkhand

  18. Shekhar,
    I like reading your blurbs. I am trying to find that balance in life where I can enjoy my sorrows just like I do that with my happiness. But it intrigues me, that most of us write so much about the sadness in our lives.

  19. isn’t life all about an exchange of energies and aren’t we blessed if, in a deliberate or accidental meeting, we manage to uplift another person or introduce some new thoughts into another’s life?
    that was how i felt after meeting you, much blessed are you for being able to nurture another.

  20. A haunting doubt
    we had no future
    and i told you so too
    but we still had a lot
    to give each other.
    should i feel guilty for having
    given and taken what i could;
    should i have veered away from you?
    i could have prevented you
    from hope and hurt
    Had i not befriended you.
    i would not have traded my love
    away to avoid heartbreak
    was i wrong in thinking the same of you?
    time heals;
    i have healed and so will you.
    but those moments of despair i went through
    could i have spared you?
    this has been haunting me since:
    should it only be all or nothing,
    is it wrong to have something in between?

  21. My dear other self Shekhar,
    I feel the same..there is nothing but LOVE…
    To feel love and oneness is to live
    And this the magic of our goden change
    Is all the truth I know or seek..
    Sri Aurobindo’s – SAVITRI

  22. I hope you are doing well. Just logged into your site after long time, and it feels very comforting to see all of your exchanges with the world. I wish you the best

  23. what about those who have love somewhere in them, but are so scared and angry/protective, that after paths cross, they take and take and take, and you justify this selfishness by the 10% they give back.

    when they realize its too painful to change their ego-centric set patterns of thought, they shed their relationships to regain “freedom”. It is a pattern with these types of people, shedding one relationship after another. Does that change the 10% they gave back? Is this a blessed relationship too? I believe so but don’t understand how.

  24. Pranaam Shekhar ji

    This is beautiful expression of deep emotions. Love to read and expecting some more from you.
    When pain arises, we must embrace it but never feed it.There are many differing viewpoints, I feel – relationships never die. All the love, memories we created is still there. We live on – in the hearts of everyone we have touched and nurtured. Spiritually, the closeness that we feel serves us by propelling us into a sense of oneness that reminds us of our connection to the Divine.

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