where lies the identity
of this realm called freedom ?
which way do I point myself
where are the signpost
and which path do I take
and not look back with regret ?
where is the path
in which each crunch of my footsteps
is not a jarring calling
of my own doubt ?
freedom
at the crossroads that i stand
each sign post in different directions
each pointing towards freedom
i stand still
sensing that freedom exists
wherever i am
and wherever i go
why then the urge to go ?
when the centre of the universe exists
wherever I am
but also
wherever I go ?
shekhar
…believing
and yet,
so many veils cover my senses
turning me from one corner to the next
as this illusion
will play with me
as long as
I let it
~~~
Cinda
The ‘I’ which thinks
and which goes
and which doubts
and which finds freedom-the sure path
and which looks for signposts
and which hears the crunch of footsteps
and which fears regret
is only as apprehensive as the ‘I’
which once feared his ship will fall at the end of the Earth!!
Dear Shekhar,
Following is an excerpt from a review I wrote for my Dad’s book a few months back.It just seems pertinent under this post.This book was inspired by the same question and doubt that your poem depicts here-The quest for Freedom.
********************
Having science as academic background he recalls that scientists have reduced all the forces working in the Universe to four basic ones-the gravitational,electromagnetic,strong and weak interactions.While on the other hand born in a religious ambience he was quick to realise that “All is One”.
The dialouge,a mystical insight, is in the form of a question that challenges him and then is followed by an immediate answer:
‘Mystics,philosophers have always spoken of freedom,liberation,nirvana.Ultimately for whom and from whom?’
‘For this Oneness and from those four forces…’
This dialouge becomes a spirituo-scientific law as the author sees the Universal panaroma of evolution unfolding inevitably in its light.
************************
In the next comment I have given the full one & half page review:
Self-Designed Universe by Harbhajan Singh
Janus Publishing Company. Pages 209
-A Review.
If today one was to enquire for the Truth-the purpose of existence-about oneself and the whole Universe one could either go to Science or Philosophy or Religion(Mysticism).These are the only three routes to Knowledge.All three have vast followings and usually most of the general followers equipped with commonsense maintain some kind of a belief in all of them.But puritanically speaking none of the three have as yet been able to see eye to eye with each other.
This book for the first time aspires to show convincingly that reality in-itself has three aspects(realms as in the book)-the physical, the mental(virtual) and the spiritual.The physical(or actual) is studied by scientists wherein things are put in front and studied materially to the minutest possible detail.The virtual(or mental) is the world of thoughts and visions which is contemplated upon by philosophers in the mind.And thirdly the spiritual realm which is directly experienced by mystics,the religious or the devoutly Faithful.
Once this new paradigm of understanding reality in its three aspects is appreciated it goes on to link the concepts of scientists,philosophers and mystics to show how they compliment each other in creating a wholesome understanding of Existense.
The crux of the book lies in a dialouge which the author finds himself engulfed in while passing through an existencial crisis in his mid-life.Before presenting his dialouge in ditto i think it fit to describe its components which, as he claims,offered themselves to get composed in his mind.
Having science as academic background he recalls that scientists have reduced all the forces working in the Universe to four basic ones-the gravitational,electromagnetic,strong and weak interactions.While on the other hand born in a religious ambience he was quick to realise that “All is One”.
The dialouge,a mystical insight, is in the form of a question that challenges him and then is followed by an immediate answer:
‘Mystics,philosophers have always spoken of freedom,liberation,nirvana.Ultimately for
whom and from whom?’
‘For this Oneness and from those four forces…’
This dialouge becomes a spirituo-scientific law as the author sees the Universal panaroma of evolution unfolding inevitably in its light. He envisions in his mind the origin and subsequent evolution of species-from minerals to plants to animals to man and so on keeping only Earth in focus.Applying the same law he explains evolution of all and everything from the Universe as a whole down to the least space-time entity. He further nullifies blind chance and Darwin’s ‘Survival of the fittest’ and relegates the entomologist’s theory of natural selection to a secondary position which provides only snapshot explanation of an instant in a longer logical law-abiding story.
In the book he goes on further to explain his mind’s visions in detail under this law’s light.They encompass evolution of cultures,cells,humans,species,genes,history,astronmical figures etc etc.He uses, wherever required ,the quotes of established scientists, philosophers, spiritual gurus to support his theses.Some interesting diagrams, pictures, and tables make this seminal attempt quite readable provided the reader starts it with an open mind without any particular bias towards any discipline or a prejudiced mindset.I sincerely believe that if one is able to seperate the wheat from the chaff one is bound to have a new and more satisfying understanding of the Universe and also of one’s own life.
In nutshell its essense from a human point of view is that you interact with four natural forces in your life:
1. Gravity:growing tall in your childhood; while getting up daily.
2. Electromagnetism: attractions and repulsions in youth; daily feelings of the presence of the same or opposite sex(however mild or strong)
3. Strong Nuclear force: force encountered in the adult settled phase of life; force felt in the head,the force of thoughts of accumulating wealth,of weilding power over others,the social force felt daily and the force of intellect.
4. Weak Nuclear force:force of Universal Oneness and Love experienced in the wise age of life; the ego trnscending force felt daily during and after religious prayers,deep thoughtless meditation or even sometimes while looking at the stars.The force that instills altruism.The force which keeps us going even amidst all conflicts, struggles and doubts created by the other forces.
To take just one more case from his book(this one non-anthropological)he explains how evolutionary transmutation of each species ie minerals to plants,plants to animals,animals to men and men to supermen(holy men or sages) is nothing but primarily an overcoming of a certain force for example gravity,elctromagnetism,strong and weak respectively in the above species based transmutations.For many more such cases which daunt the mind of every cutting-edge scientist,philosopher or a general reader curious about the Universe in general and his role in it in particular I would proffer this book to her/him which to me felt worth every paisa.The lack of hardheaded scientific approach has been made up for by its mind opening thinking-out-of-the-box approach.
Hopefully this new understanding giving due importance to all the three disciplines of knowledge-Science,Philosophy and Spirituality(Religion/Mysticism) a la body,mind and soul-will quench one’s thirst for knowlegde of the bigger picture most satisfactorily and deeply, catering to all faculities-physical,mental and spiritual.This would help better understand why the world is perfect even with its wars and sufferings and also the efforts being made to overcome them. It will stregthen your Faith in the inherent Scheme of Things(SOT).It will urge you to keep on doing the good work that you are if you from the deep within feel the need for it. It will give you the courage to make the little changes that you feel compelled from within to make as it all does serve a larger purpose. Lastly but most importantly it reiterates the mystical faith in total surrender to the SOT.It encourages you to live each moment cheerfully knowing that it is the same Oneness playing a game with the four forces of nature everywhere a la Shiva and Parvati,Krishna and Radha(or Purusha and Prakriti).The new thing you would have known after reading this book is the detail of this Cosmic Game.
Harpreet Raj Singh
Patiala
7.4.2007
“why then the urge to go? when the centre of the universe exists wherever I am but also wherever I go ?”
That is the essence of truth. If we understood what this truly meant, it would end our restlessness to be ‘anywhere but here’. You’ve put it very simply and beautifully.
…I was thinking about ‘to be in the world and not of it’. How it this possible?
If we are to be true to the moment, or thought, or action, how can we not be in it? be in it’s flow. utterly and completely. These and other similar terms like dispassionate action I don’t understand. Can it be learnt?
Dear Kavita,
It seems u really have undestood the essense of truth.Has ur restlessness to be’anywhere but here’ended then.
I think this dilemma can better be understood thru Hisenberg’s uncertainty principle:We can either know the position of a particle(here) or its momentum(the urge to go).While we know about one the other becomes ‘uncertain’.
Hi Shekhar
I am an Actor of Indian Origin living in Toronto Canada. I have done some Television Series and small films here locally. I also shot a doc couple of years back.
Never wrote a dairy until Christmas 2006. I think I was finally in love for first time and she decided to go her way. It was hard and I am still dealing with it.
Here is something I wrote on Freedom
—
Am I A Fool
Why do I feel
The Eyes of the world on me
I feel like a fool
She betrayed me
Why did I feel
To keep snooping around
I feel like a fool
She was cheating around
Why did I feel
I am really insecure
I feel like a fool
Time proved why I was so sure
Why do I feel
She will realize one day
I feel like a fool
Why should I wait for that day
For we know
I may feel like a fool
That day will come
I will my freedom, for she is a fool
#2
A beautiful description of the indestructible and eternal ‘ground’ of us all, Harpreet!
Dear Harpreet,
It’s a process, and sometimes you feel you have attained the true meaning of life, and then one day you feel you have only just scratched the surface. Both are joyful, both are tormenting. Both are the truth.
thank u dear D.
Dear Shekhar,
“and which path do I take
and not look back with regret ?”
Well one of my respected teachers used to say ” Everything in life is Retrospective”. Now i relise how true it is…..Everyday in life we stand at crossroads and wonder weather we r taking the right path….amd most of the times it is impossible to tell at that time and only later in time we know weather it was right or wrong….Retrospectively….so i guess the best way is to judge with reason and whatever happens later u just hav d satisfaction that you did what u thought was right……
Lighting your path
Am I destined to this life?
A life where I have to learn to be someone else?
A life where I have to learn to be dumb
Be silent when I want to cry out loud
A life where I have to learn to be deaf
Not react even to the worst of words
A life where I have to learn to be blind
Not see what is naked to the eye
A life where I have to learn to be dependent
Cause I am needed for another to feel wanted?
Why do I possess this inner strength?
If I still have to face this abuse
What use is a light
If I cannot use it in darkness?
Look within yourself
For there is so much power inside
That we only need to know
How and when to use it!!
© Hema Ramachandran, 2007
chipping away at me to make me fit a mould
thats easiest for the rest to live with
chipping away so much of me that i don’t exist anymore.
the mould exists, the mould everyone else finds easy to live with
the mould, the empty mould, devoid of life
however bad things got
life was still worth living.
taking simple pleasure in beauty, music, art
nothing spectacular, just the morning mist, evening light, green grass, decorative flowers
the pleasure was inside, the pleasure of life, the pleasure of being.
i now exist.
i now see more beauty than ever before but
no pleasure within to seek out and soak the beauty without.
all the people i liked,
i wanted to make them feel special
had more true friends than normal
all feeling special.
now there is no one.
i have faded in all their lives
as days have faded since then
maybe i never could belong to anyone.
yes, i needed a home and hearth
but one which would not bind me
a base and not a clutch.
the clutch squeezes a lot from me
But i give nothing of my heart.
Whatever I give is cold comfort, to me and the rest.
i don’t see freedom anywhere in the future
i don’t see me exist without that freedom
i will live on as the mould.
wish YOU had taken me away when there was still life in me
when i still had people who would have mourned me
ME and not just the convenience of my existence.
if not then, i wish YOU would take me now.
take me now. Or don’t YOU want me anymore?
then pour life back into me again
LIFE not just the duty of living
LIFE with the desire to live and give full-heartedly
then take me when i am living it to the fullest.
take me before i am forced into a mould again.
Hi Shekhar
Many months ago I wrote about something personal in my life. I do know if I ever healed but I have managed to come out as a better human – I feel that way.I had lost my dairy – the I found it – I kept writing _ today I have hundreds of pages of thoughts, scribbles and life_lots of written material
At one point I had gone through a lot of material on your blog and the note on your daughter that you wrote. I cried that evening because I had dream once with someone. We dreamed of naming her Rhea – For the Rhea my Dream and to your Daughter with all the blessing from up above –
Rhea is a Dream she promised
Rhea is the Dream she remembers
Rhea is the Dream will remind her
Rhea is the Dream that will bind her
Rhea is a Greek Goddess
Rhea is a moon of Saturn
Rhea is a bird flightless
Rhea is a Dream you heartless
Rhea is what I wanted
Rhea is what you wanted
Rhea and a home we wanted
Rhea is still a Dream still alive
Rhea is the one that kept me alive
Rhea will bring you to me – my life
~Kaash Gauni
The poem is really nice and it tell the truth in my opinion. Congratulations to the writer!
This is an excellent study of the Battle of Antietam which places it well in the context of the Civil War and which encourages the reader to reflect on the meaning of the War and of the nature of American freedom.