True lasting love : is it devotion ?

This came in from Cinda and I found it very beautiful :
It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80s arrived to have his stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On examining it I saw it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors and got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while as she suffers with Alzheimer’s disease.
As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised and asked him, “And do you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?”
He smiled as he patted my hand and said, “She doesn’t know me anymore but I still know who she is.” I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm and thought,
“That is the kind of love I want in my life. True love is neither physical nor romantic.”
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be……


Peace is seeing a sunset and knowing who to thank. The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything they are just able to make the best of everything they have.
The road to success is not straight.
There is a curve called Failure,
a loop called Confusion,
speed bumps called Friends,
red lights called Enemies,
caution lights called Family.
You will have flats called Jobs.
But, if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perseverance,
insurance called Faith,
a driver called Almighty God,
you will make it to a place called Success.
~unknown

43 Responses to “True lasting love : is it devotion ?”

  1. yayaver says:

    Love,most beautiful and touching of all emotions..
    @Shekhar sir, beautiful words-“True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be……”

  2. Neelum says:

    Dear Shekharji,
    I follow your blog regularly, I am writing in only now to share with you an incident that happened last night. We live in KL, Malaysia, and last night Zee TV was showing Mr. India. I am 31 now and still remember the first time I saw the movie sitting on my Papa’s lap. Well yesterday I watched it with my 3 year old son who laughed and laughed at the way the kids woke up with showers in their bed !! and some even brushing their teeth !! He also loved the song-sequence about the ball.
    I was/am so happy to know that my son loved something that I loved as a kid and still do….
    Thank you for this moment in my life.

  3. karma says:

    Ohhhh…am crying!!! wonderful to know such things is still possible, it gives me hope to become like that and to meet someone like that…

  4. Love – peace within.

  5. Grasshopper says:

    Lovely post, Shekhar.
    ‘She might not know me, but I still know who she is.’ This IS devotion. In fact, this is prayer. We sometimes wonder if God knows us, personally, and still we meet Him through an idol, a book, a film :), a thought.

  6. austere says:

    This reminded me of my grandparents.
    If this was possible then- they were married when she was 8 and he 11- why should it not be possible now?
    Best, sir.

  7. kavitha says:

    truly beautifully sublime!

  8. Varsha says:

    True lasting love of this old man…making my eyes fill with tears. There is nothing more greater than this kind of devotion.

  9. ruchi says:

    True love is loving and living with person through ups and downs, good, bad and ugly.
    for me love is realist expectations from self and one you love and giving your all.

  10. pratish says:

    its awsome………its shows the true meaning of love………….its shows how to leave life…….

  11. Horst Vollmann says:

    Dear Cinda:
    When happy times have left and the rawness of a heartbreak threatens to overwhelm a persons defense mechanisms the true strength of character takes over. This gallant man in your touching story is one of the many unsung heroes in a world that is fixated on the sensational, superficial and trivial. Our todays world that barely notices such beautiful acts of love and devotion needs to rethink its priorities and search in its collective soul for the relevance of the moment in which human kindness gives us hope that our race after all will survive and thrive.
    The truly heroic acts rarely take place on the sensationalized world stage but rather in the unreported existence of our daily lives. When in the 80s a few of my close gay friends battled to the bitter end of Aids their mates stood at their sides in ways that still brings me to tears. True love will not end when the singing and the dancing has stopped. It will actually begin. I can only salute this man and hope that I am spared such a heartbreak but it will also give me the realization that there is much more love in this world than we will ever know.
    With kind regards.
    Horst

  12. DQ says:

    Brilliant!!
    Devotion is love!
    .
    love is devotion
    open my arms to thee…
    ‘O’ ripples, waves storms
    in this ocean…
    .
    Life!!
    ShekhARRRRRRRRRRRRRr
    here I face another victory of my life!!!
    .
    Third one wohOOoo!!
    .
    One more remains baas one more
    .
    And here I shall fail eh heh!!!

  13. Thualsy Mary Elizabeth says:

    Thank You Sekhar for posting this on blog.

  14. Just Awesome…Very Touching and spiritual to an extent.
    Lets make the best of everything we have. And learn to enjoy more with whatever we don’t have…If we get the the desired things..its great!…If we don’t get em Its even greater…
    Cinda, Shekhar, I would like to make a short out of this great piece if you permit.
    loved it!
    Sanjay

  15. Manav says:

    This is simply the character we need to imbibed in our lives.. This is in it’s truest and purest form possible, & thrives without inhibitions and without any judgments..
    Great !!
    EMotional !!
    True Courage !!
    May God bless such people !!
    Manav

  16. wisdom of Ganga says:

    I salute this person.
    If only we know who we are,
    the other is not apart then.

  17. All I want is to be able to trust my loved one. That is all he seems to want too. Everything else comes after that, if at all. Trusting that your loved one will do the best for you. Love is about that for me.

  18. My warm belief is that we are truly meant to love, for it is our way, here, of knowing the Divine–in whatever form you most believe it exists. Even here we know love transcends all else, as does the Divine.

  19. Cleopatra says:

    hmmm… i wud say such man in such times is a dream person. people are too cosmetic and love has lost its meaning and purity .Its nice to read about such devotion because its talks of ‘hope” for those who have lost believing in “love” completely.

  20. praveen says:

    Until we perceive love there is hatred…they co-exist.
    i love india, someone likes pakistan so we fight??? how weird! and same with all the love stories and romance.
    Osama said , “one man’s terrorist is another’s freedom fighter” . how true, the whole of afghan and part of pakistan loves him while USA hates him?
    love as a word and concept only divides, the true love and universal love which cannot be perceived is working on its own, we need not through our thoughts and ideals achieve it or find it.
    it works on its own automatically…
    stop this spreading love nonsense please, it sounds like a disease.

  21. Cinda says:

    Dear Friends,
    Your comments and thoughts on this post are rather interesting in the many different perspectives.
    I wrote the gentleman who sent it to me to try and get the name of the author.
    I will post it here as soon as it arrives.
    The story moved me to tears within also.
    My father and mother both shared that kind of love with me, so I am truly grateful for having the experience with me that I may also share with others.
    Loving you,
    Cinda

  22. mee says:

    I had tears in my eyes when I read this. Thank you.

  23. Cinda,
    I took care of my father for several years, as he also had Alzheimer’s Disease. I left the entertainment industry to come back to the Midwest, where I was until he died, and then helping my mother in selling the house, and then get settled back in our hometown. My father was a small town district attorney–we used to think of him as our own, prosecutorial Atticus Finch, and as his youngest daughter, I was Scout to his Atticus. He was a strong, kind, but stoic man, who didn’t say “I love you,” easily. In taking care of him those last years, after the anger passed, and his mind could no longer act as a defense mechanism against emotion, he started to truly feel, unencumbered. That also included him spontaneously coming up to me with tears in his eyes, putting his hand on my arm, looking at me deeply, and telling me he loved me. Sometimes those were the only words he could manage. Even if he couldn’t remember my name. The emotion was always there. Caring for someone you love deeply, you remember the true meaning of that emotion. It is also true, too, when you are at your most vulnerable, as he was, and without the power of his mind stopping him from feeling.
    I think all of these are the warmest possible lessons on what love means…when it comes, pure, unadorned, but with a depth that is deeper than most things in life will otherwise ever be.
    When I think about loving someone, I know if true love is there, it will have that depth, warmth, and transcendence as its hallmarks. Any other quality or emotion will obscure it–perhaps because of the defenses we erect, and sometimes, too, even because of the wary, protective power of our own minds.
    Thomas Mann said that love, not reason, is stronger than death. I’d posit that it is stronger than much else we will ever know. 😉
    Warmest regards,
    RdS/Kris

  24. Cinda says:

    Dear Kris,
    Thank you for sharing your story here…heartfelt, as I can imagine the experience was countless more in expression and emotion.
    Yes, it is that which hurts most deep and joys most deep, we find connections that are lasting.
    Must have been an amazing journey for you and your Dad. You were both fortunate to have each other. I don’t know how long ago that was, but I would like to convey my thoughts and prayers to you and your family for healing and peace.
    As with you, I was also my Dad’s youngest daughter. He was not the type of person to say “I love you”, but you knew it if he did. There was not a single doubt about it!
    Love is like that…some people need to hear it, some need to say it and there is no best way really…”to each their own”
    Although, there is much to ponder when a Being can feel and know the love of another…without words, a rather powerful experience.
    in spirit,
    Cinda

  25. N.Rama says:

    Love requires no object as in the statement “such a one has a loving heart”. Who does that one love? SELF? What then is SELF?
    I am not in the body
    I am not the senses
    I am not the mind
    I am not this
    I am not that
    What then am I?
    What is the SELF?
    It is in the body
    It is in everybody
    It is everywhere
    It is the ALL
    It is SELF
    I am IT
    ABSOLUTE ONENESS.
    Blessed be,
    rama

  26. hi, shekhar, visiting first time . feeling good.
    i have written…blog on rediffiland, iam regular writting on rediffiland, i have written,few lines want to share with you.
    MILA JAB MERE MAIN SE,
    KHUD ME KHUDA KO DEKHA,
    NAJRE UTHAKAR CHARO AUR DEKHA,
    SAB ME KHUDA KO DEKHA,

  27. gayatri says:

    its a gr8 lesson sekhar ji….really touched my heart…..

  28. Sree says:

    this is the story from the movie “Notebook”.

  29. Phani says:

    what a story…nothing like holding back tears…but man it touched me at the bottom of my heart!!!…Love is blissful…and I am still searching for a true companion!!!

  30. ravi says:

    hai shekhar…..
    what are ur future projects……

  31. Rahul says:

    dear shekhar
    all these words and stories on true love sound nice in theory, dont want to touch a chord in your heart, but ur divorce speaks louder than all the words said here…

  32. sai says:

    This is exactly represented in the film – The Notebook

  33. manav kaul says:

    Hi Shekhar…
    Beautiful….:-)
    Manav kaul
    http://www.aranyamanav.blogspot.com/

  34. sunita says:

    dear Rahul, we can’t possibly know all the details of his divorce and it’s unkind to refer to it here, while ignorant. it may have been exactly what two souls needed to move to the next level and be a blessing to them.
    from another SK blog:
    Imagine
    a love you could embrace
    the whole universe with
    if only you came out of
    the solitary confinement
    your ego has imprisoned you in

  35. Dhruv says:

    Its beautiful … and loved the analogy of what it takes to be successful

  36. alok shah says:

    hhi mr shekhar!
    very touching! actually i was stunned for a while….it make us realize that do the small things that we fight/worry for is worth it?….
    thanks & and keep posing!

  37. latha says:

    Undoubtedly, True Lating Love is DEVOTION……..there is no second thought.Devotion , thy name is true lasting love.

  38. Val Darrant says:

    Love has devotion when it has its Commitment,Dedication as due to duty or a feeling that I should be Devoted..nice enough..Yet
    I add a Simple Word.. it is CARE..The Spontaneous Emotion,A Process, The Vital Connectivity of Souls..
    CARE is The Word that is missing from Love or even Devotion( which could be forced and may not stand The Test of Time n Trials)..CARE is The Emotion that Makes Love True and Lasting..
    Devotion in Love is just Because there is True Care from The HEART..TRULY CARE in all Dimensions till The Last..Then Love will Last..and EverLast..
    A cobbler was heard communicating to The Lord , as follows..”Dearest Lord,Today I shall make you a Pair of Finest Shoes out of The Best Leather that is in the market..and O Dearest Lord, the shoes now u wear may be having patches, or may be having dust on them..I shall patch them up and polish it to be shining n sparkling , so that no one will say You have torn pair of shoes and they are dust ridden,without polishing..Lord, dont you worry, I will make you Happy..I would like to see you smile and Magnificent n Majestic..After all I am making for You, a new pair of shoes from The Finest Leather..
    Funny?:)..
    Its a Fable, and Moses heard this and went to The cobbler and told him,for to him it sounded absurd that he communicated like that to The Lord..”Hello, u over there.. “Do you think He needs your Shoes? or patching up his sandals? or a mere mortal’s Care n Concern like that?He is The One, Who gives everything to us..Be Loving , devoted,Praising and Thankful to Him..enough..
    Now stop all this and Pray devotedly like this..
    He told him a prayer and left..
    The cobbler started the prayer as forced on him, he stuttered and fumbled..Then The Lord called Moses and told him..”Moses , what have you done to that cobbler? His love,care n concern on Me is one of The Best Prayers I received from Earth..Now go back and tell him , that he can continue to say from his heart , what he wants to tell me..Moses wnet back and told the cobbler to be, as he is at heart to The Lord
    The Doctor has His CARE for His Love,The Dear Woman, who has been with Him as His Better Half, Who Shared Life with Him ,Happiness or Sorrow..Progress or Stagnancy..Stood Together in Tribulations perhaps..Fought at times perhaps..Still CARED for each other..Still He Cares Immemsely for her memory has gone into Oblivion..He Loves n CARES..
    Between Couples , let there be Agape,Storge,Philos, and Eros..as accordingly..as Spontaneously as it should be..All Since CARE is The WORD, The VITAL EMOTION..Care will not lead to DIVORCES, for if there are Differences, There can be Constructive Compromises..since They can CARE for each others grievances..
    Eg.If a Loving , Caring wife is ill, tend to her as a Father, or a Caring Male Nurse..since she too does it when her man is ill, she takes care of him as a mother..She does not go for Kitty parties, for she has concern and care for you in her Love..
    Let Love not be Careless in Loving as if its Free Flowing..Let There be Caring Love..Thus Strength, Power in Love..
    For Love without Power ( Strength,Discipline due to True Care in Love) is merely Sentimental,Anaemic,Superficial and Even Destructive..)
    CARE N LOVE from YOUR HEARTS,Get Spontaneously Bonded by Care..LOVE WILL BE TAKEN CARE OF..TILL THE LAST,Devoted,Dedicated and Full It will be..And YONDER..
    TAKE DEAR CARE..My Dear,Dearest Ones,can I say?
    Yes, TDC..

  39. Rajesh says:

    Beautiful …. very beautiful

  40. ARNOLD says:

    THAT IS LOVE…TRUE LOVE..

  41. Ashok Barthwal says:

    Very touchy…….. Beautiful definition of love….. I think every couple should read the story and should learn from the same.

  42. Surabhi says:

    Dear Shekharji
    Yes, True love is neither physical nor romantic. -Aaradhana!!- no boundaries, unconditional,…. …..it could be without social commitment also. ….Such type of people are very rare , but yes, there are…..
    My request to people ….Divorce is something social.., please do NOT mixed it with this.
    Shekharji i want to send some (truth of life), .. You only can understand and explain that in appropriate words. Please send me, your official E-mail address.
    Regards

  43. Cinda says:

    5 years ago, Shekhar posted this story after it was sent to him.
    I am bring it back here…because it is a great reminder for me and also for anyone else who is inspired by it…

    This came in from Cinda and I found it very beautiful :
    It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80s arrived to have his stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On examining it I saw it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors and got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
    While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while as she suffers with Alzheimer’s disease.
    As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised and asked him, “And do you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?”
    He smiled as he patted my hand and said, “She doesn’t know me anymore but I still know who she is.” I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm and thought,
    “That is the kind of love I want in my life. True love is neither physical nor romantic.”
    True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be……

    Peace is seeing a sunset and knowing who to thank. The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything � they are just able to make the best of everything they have.
    The road to success is not straight.
    There is a curve called Failure,
    a loop called Confusion,
    speed bumps called Friends,
    red lights called Enemies,
    caution lights called Family.
    You will have flats called Jobs.
    But, if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perseverance,
    insurance called Faith,
    a driver called Almighty God,
    you will make it to a place called Success.
    ~unknown

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