addicted

I do
because I want things done
but the more they are done
the more I want done
till
i ask
what did i really want to do ?
and what was really done ?
for the drug
called ‘done’
is a finishing line
that i am constantly
and breathlessly
running towards
that seems to run
away from me….


tantalizing me
with endless possibilities
endless dreams
endless fantasies
that i see reflected
in other people’s eyes
and the doing
that breathless next step
that stumbling
that racing pulse
trying to keep pace
with the done
slow down
for the faster your run, shekhar
the more the done is an illusion
a fragment of your imagination
stop
look around
breathe
calm down
smile
and see
how beautiful
just the next step is
just the next breath is
listen, then
to the frustrated screams
of the ‘done’
of the finishing line
and see
that it was an illusion
a construct
of your own mind
when you first began
to run
and forgot
that you ran
for the pleasure of running
and the finishing line
came
with every step
you had passed
so many ‘done’s’
went by
that you failed to see
and then shall return
the pleasure of doing
separate
from that
which is done

14 Responses to “addicted”

  1. Pratima says:

    that’s a nice piece…

  2. Sir,
    Each step towards the finishing line is a DONE thing. Unless we are consumed by a MIRAGE in Desert.
    Marathon is but an addiction of running to an exhaustion of thy ownself rather than cross the finishing line.
    A child feels satisfied in playing pleasure once the energy gets exhausted and its time to come back home to recharge your own self in the care of mother/guardian and guided to calmed sleep for another Day another Finishing Line.
    Vinod Agarwal – Addicted to Exhaustion..May be!

  3. Harb says:

    hi shekhar
    beautiful sentiment
    here’s one from me
    on the relevant theme
    what beauty
    the game of life
    of being and becoming
    presents
    everything is done
    yet being done
    everything is being done
    yet already done
    now i am asleep
    and doing my dream
    now i am awake
    the dream is done
    what it would look like
    when I am
    in the waking dream
    or in the wakeful dream?
    everything is done
    yet being done
    everything is being done
    yet already done
    what are the dimensions
    of a dream
    where the waves
    on an infinite ocean end?
    the answer is not
    in the dream
    nor in the waves
    it’s in me, it’s with the sea
    in fact there is no question
    i and my dream are not two
    nor sea and waves on it
    no separation no question no answer

  4. Koizen says:

    may I use ‘Hinglish’?
    Mann kabhi kaheta hei done?
    Koi finishing line pey hota hei won?
    eat your daily bread, jam and bun…
    but most importantly just have fun
    thoda man mei hooga confuzion,
    par socha toh hua aisa mann
    ab mann samaj saaka confuzion
    toh kam hooga illuzion
    waisey zindagi ki car mei jaatey hei speed mei
    key koi aagey na nikal jaaye, hamari deeds say
    bas sahi ho speed aur inspiration
    par petrol na hoo, aur na ho sahi direction
    thoda rukh jaaye, thaam ley cross intersection
    chand saasey mei kar ley introspection
    phir man hum ko khila raha hei ya hum man ko
    yeh samaj kar apney aap say poochey…done ?

  5. Vinay Joshi says:

    “Shall return the pleasure of doing separate from that which is done”! IS it possible. You cant return. You have to embark on a new journey.
    BTW to this day, we rave about your movie, Mr India, and that its difficult to make a movie about gadgets. Any new movies like that in mind?
    LEts say, a gadget, which would blurt out whats in the other person’s mind, rather than what he speaks! Adam Sandler’s movie about remote control was a creative idea, not carried out well.
    Heard a lot about Devi and the cartoon movies. Whats the update?

  6. DQ says:

    Good Morning Shekhar!
    Addicted I was to the dreams I made
    armoured myself, for the long strain
    turning and twisting was the path
    ‘here I stand, facing stark wrath’
    .
    .
    Halt! run not towards that seems to run
    ’tis for the undone to return
    if returneth, twas the truth
    if not, ’twas a mere dream I salute
    .
    .
    ‘truth always a ruthless brute’
    .
    .
    ‘I ran not to do’ souls lay astray
    voices in utter twinge would pray
    their chants were my conviction
    what do I say, became my addiction!
    .
    .
    breathlessly…
    ran towards a mirage, people claimed
    victory was mine, now I stand blamed
    what seems to run away from me
    is nothing but ‘just me’
    .
    .
    ‘just me’

  7. Anil says:

    Excellent and encouraging thoughts shekhar..!!! I see your thoughts about events in India…good to learn about various facts. I always felt that a group of people like yourself can play a effective role in shaping the modern Indian society….keep it up…
    I was also trying to see your movie Gawahi(1989)since quite some time..but could not find anywhere in London…Is it possible for you to upload that movie on net, and let me know the link ..so i can view it please…
    Thanks…Best Regards,…CA.Anil

  8. Guzar rahi hai zindagi kuch is tarah se, ki ise kahi kisi manzil ki talaash hai…

  9. austere says:

    It is a choice. 🙂
    Baki boss the sunrises are spectacular these days, palm and neem outlined etched against the still peach, the just awakening bird chatter and rustle.

  10. Mee says:

    Someone once told me that I am fast becoming a control freak. Is DONE a manifestation of the same? I wonder. Because it never is done with Done. We find more things to do as being in a state of limbo is not on, or just being is not good enough…being in a hurry makes it seem like there is some purpose to live…

  11. Everywhere people are running with great speed. Time is short, the sun is setting; any moment the darkness can descend. Run as fast as you can! Man has been inventing faster and faster ways to reach, but if you ask him, “Where do you want to reach?” he feels embarrassed; he is not really clear where he wants to reach. One thing he is clear about is that he wants to reach there quickly, because life is short and much has to be found. The soul, God, bliss, truth, freedom…so many things have to be found, and his hands are absolutely empty. _ OSHO

  12. Mee..you’ve hit it spot on. ‘ being in a hurry makes it seem like there is some purpose to live..’- the grand illusion.
    Karma – we can’t escape. Attachement to its fruits we can.When we do that we can take the ‘worry’ out of the ‘hurry’. As Shekhar, reminds himself and us, it surely is the journey and not the end. The purpose of doing what we have to, most of us do not fully comprehend. While you are at it, observe what happens if the need to hurry that your mind creates dissapears, maybe for a moment. Does that emptiness scare you, or do you want to embrace it? There is a beauty too deep and basic in that emptiness.When you observe it, feel it, experience it, you will sense the illusory nature of your mind and its need to hurry.

  13. Neeta says:

    If you didn’t do, we wouldn’t have this wonderful blog!
    I do hope you reach the ‘pleasure of doing separate from that which is done’. If I may ask, do you follow any path towards living consciously ?

  14. Mica says:

    Well DONE!!!

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