How much of what I do, directly results in what gets done. And how much of what I do actually becomes the impediment in what I desire to get done ? How do I know ?
Does every event have an individuality of it’s own ? Like you and I have. Or is every event, every eventuality, a potential, a probability ? And then are you and I also a probability, a potential ?
So I if I want to get something done, how many other events must come into synch before the event becomes a percievable reality ? Even an event like my striking a match must rely on the match being made, the box being made, the process of the match and the box coming to my hand, and the moment that I actually strike the match against the box. How many events must have to created for me to have chosen that moment. This would go back to the ‘chance’ of the creation of ‘fire’ and to the very birth of the Universe.
So here is the question. If so many innumerable events must have come together, to give me the choice of striking the match against the box, surely it is just my ego that tells me that the ‘end result’ of all those events was my striking the match against the box. I am obviously just part of the immense, continous and infinite chain of interrelated events that never ends. My choice, if it ever was that, is just part of that matrix. Not anything I do, or claim to have done, is the end result. And therefore, why do I consider myself an individual, if I am merely a cog in the wheel of the infinite matrix of the events, and nothing that I do is the ‘end game’.
Or do I just have the wrong definition of ‘Individual’. I certainly have the wrong spelling. I am an Individual only if I am. Or I think I am. And I am so, only if I can do what I think I can do. And my desription of doing is totally defined by the definitive result of my doing, is that not my induviduality tells me ? But if what am I doing, if I ‘am’ at all, is merely part of his infinite matrix of events, that have absolutely no ‘end game’ then by this definition I am not an individual.
Why then at the Oscar acceptance speech, does no one ever say ” I, whoever that I may be, accept this Oscar in humility of the knowledge that I was merely a potential in the never ending unfolding of infinite events. As is this potential event of my acceptance of this statuette.